This press release contains dated information and should be used for background only.
With newschannels offering 24-hour coverage of the war in Iraq and information from the campaign creeping into virtually every element of our lives, children can easily be confused and frightened about what they are hearing.
Martha Barnard, Ph.D., clinical associate professor of behavioral pediatrics with the University of Kansas School of Medicine, said it is important to talk to your children about war.
"All children are going to be affected. The key is to understand how they are being affected and talk to them about it," Barnard said. "You don't want to presume what their fears are, you need to talk to them, to bring it out and help them express themselves."
She added that for younger children, a key might be to allow them to draw pictures.
"Art is very good, it allows the younger children to work through their fears," Barnard said.
She said that in extreme cases children might suffer from problems including lack of appetite, trouble going to sleep or aggressive behavior. "Not all kids will have these behaviors, but these are the warning flags," she said.
"If you think they are really struggling, seek help. But in most cases, parents need to settle down and determine how to get their kids through it."
Although there are no universal answers, Barnard came up with a list of ways to help children of various ages understand and cope with war news.
- Communicate their safety: "Younger children have trouble understanding the difference between fact and fantasy. It is important they understand that what is happening is far away and that they are still safe in their homes with their parents."
- Help them understand: "Too often parents send their kids to another room or tell them not to watch the news. With the younger children it just makes them think you are hiding something, and with school age and teens, it lessens your ability to listen to them and help with their concerns."
- Allow them to play: "Children's work is play. The way children work though things is through playing. Allow them to play war. As long as they don't get too aggressive it is an outlet for them to work out some of their feelings. Play is a child's way of expressing their feelings."
- Try to limit exposure: "While allowing them to watch the news with you is good, it can't be 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Parents need to monitor how much information the children are receiving and be ready to answer questions and explain things. Also, newspapers and magazines shouldn't be left lying around. If the kids are excitable, those behaviors will be magnified."
- Find other things to do: "Children need to be helped finding balance. There should be additional time with parents, board games, video tapes the family can enjoy, outdoor activities, anything that is just more than watching how the war is progressing."
- Don't lecture: "Parents shouldn't be using this time to lecture about their beliefs in war, pro or con. Just allow the children to know that this is happening and it's not new. There have been wars before and we've gone on after that."
- Allow them to help: "Find a way to allow children to get involved, like preparing Red Cross boxes or something like that. Or find some kind of positive action, like helping a neighbor or someone else. By allowing them to feel involved, they don't feel as helpless."